The Return of the Mail Bag!

What can I say? I've received literally THOUSANDS of questions over the last few months and I've not responded to a single one. My only excuse is that I've had better things to do, like going swimming and learning to walk and learning to say "mama" and "dada" and "Get off my lawn, hippy!". But I'm committed to my fans, so I'm going to take some time on a busy Saturday night and answer some of your questions.

Lucy - What happened to the music and movie editions of the mail bag? How will I know what to listen to and watch this summer? Carolyn D., Sharon, PA.

Carolyn asks a fair question. The truth is that I got caught up in my book reviews and I let this fall by the wayside. Since the summer movie season is over, I'll direct my comments to the upcoming fall slate. I'll be first in line for Where the Wild Things Are and The Road come October. I'm also semi-pumped by James Cameron's Avatar, though I think the CGI in it looks a bit pedestrian. Other movies I am sort of optimistic about include Rob Zombie's The Haunted World of El Superbeasto (which doesn't appear to have a trailer), Black Dynamite, Martin Scorsese's Shutter Island, and Tony Jaa's Ong Bak 2: The Beginning (assuming it gets a domestic release date). Wes Anderson's The Fantastic Mr. Fox doesn't look too bad either.

As for music, I'm pretty excited about the Drive By Truckers' latest, The Fine Print: A Collection of Oddities and Rarities 2003-2008, as well as the already released Murdering Oscar (and Other Love Songs) by Patterson Hood. Wolfmother has new album due in late 2008 called Cosmic Egg. But the album that hasn't left my CD player since it was released in February is Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit's self-titled album.

Lucy, NOter Dame sux and I h8 it becuz it sux. HahAHAHha you're teem is garbich!!!!1 Pete C., Los Angeles, CA.

I don't really have a response to this email, but "Pete C." has been sending me messages like this since my Manti Te'o post back in February. It would seem that he's a bit nervous about October 17.

Lucy, now that you're nine months old, what is most surprising thing you've learned about the world so far? Gretchen T., Cheyenne, WY

Gretchen, that's a great question and the answer is simple. Perhaps you haven't discovered this yet, so I suggest that you sit down. You know those wood panels below your sink? Turns out that they OPEN UP! Oh, I know. It's crazy isn't it? What's even more crazy is all the great stuff inside. Dish detergent, Windex, sponges, towels, the garbage can. I could go on. It is a veritable warehouse of playthings. Of course, my mommy and daddy won't let me in there and they keep telling me that some rogue named "Mr. Yuck" lives in there. I commissioned a police sketch of this "Mr. Yuck" and, apparently, Mr. Yuck is mean and Mr. Yuck is green:

Instead of deterring me, this piqued my interest. I was really interested in hearing Mr. Yuck's side of the story. Turns out his real name is Carl Błaszczykowski and he's a pretty good guy, though he may be a bit misunderstood due to his appearance. He grew up in Hell's Kitchen and worked his way through college by doing odd jobs on the side. One of those odd jobs was a photo shoot that resulted in the above picture. Unfortunately, prior to the photo shoot, Carl signed a publicity release and essentially waived all his rights as they related to the above picture, and Mr. Yuck was born. Carl is now an actuary living in Pomona, California. He's got four kids and a cat named Roger. He's a diehard Mets fan and, in his spare time, enjoys refinishing antique furniture. He's never even been to Indianapolis, let alone beneath my sink.

So it turns out that mommy and daddy have been feeding me a load of codswallop. It makes one wonder what else they are lying about. The goodwill they've built up thus far has officially been exhausted, and I trust nothing they say.

That's it for tonight, folks. I'll be back soon with some more book reviews and my weeklong Notre Dame Football Extravaganza that will culminate with the season opener against Nevada.