In your face, Arizona!

Last night was awesome. I got dressed up in my Steelers cheerleader outfit. This is probably my favorite outfit even though the Steelers don't technically have cheerleaders.

Then, with the help of instructions we found on the internet, we built a stadium out of twinkies, chips, meat, guacamole, cheese and salsa. I wasn't supposed to eat any of this, but I snuck a twinkie or two. Can you blame me though? For the last three months, it's been a steady diet of milk, milk, milk. Babies need variety too.

And then I settled in to watch my beloved Steelers curb-stomp the Cardinals. I did my best to yell and scream when the Steelers had the ball. But, frankly, that tired me out pretty quick and I slept through most of the second quarter. I woke up just in time to see Springsteen tear up the stage at half-time.

You all know the outcome of the game by now. Notre Dame could learn a thing or three from the Rooney family.

Here are Five Things I Know I Think About the Super Bowl (unlike that moron Peter King who only thinks he thinks things):

1. Monkeys are officially no longer funny. If you work in marketing, please immediately discard any ideas that have to do with monkeys. It's not 2001 anymore, folks. We've evolved. Monkeys have run their course. Find a new funny animal. Like an otter. Or a yak.


2. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen looks AMAZING. Unlike monkeys, giant robots beating the crap out of each other have not even come close to running their course. More, please.


3. I was unimpressed by the 3D aspects of last night's broadcast. I wore my 3D glasses and while some things certainly jumped out of the screen, it was at the expense of color and my comfort. This technology needs to be shelved until I can enjoy it without looking like a loser.


4. James Harrison's story is better than Kurt Warner's. He was cut by multiple teams. He spent years on the Steelers practice squad. And now he's the Defensive MVP of the NFL. And, unlike Kurt Warner, he takes pleasure in doling out massive amounts of pain to others.


5. John Madden needs to be put out to pasture. Listening to his commentary is like listening to the ramblings of a person who has just escaped the psych ward.

In other news, February promises to be an exciting month here on LEBSAB. I have a mailbag full of questions to answer, I have enemies to hunt, and I have naps to take. Stay tuned!